Thursday, October 20, 2005
Love is in the blogs
Among the blogs I read on a daily basis, I've started to notice a trend, which is that their authors seem to be falling in love, left and right, like there's no tomorrow. It's almost Tom Cruise/Katie Holmes-esque, only without the creepy Scientology brainwashing/publicity-stunt PDAs/mysterious pregnancy that you know had to be created artificially because everyone knows Tom Cruise is as gay as a box of birds, not to mention a stark-raving lunatic factor. All right, so other than the super-speed at which these courtships seem to be occuring, I guess they're nothing like Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes at all, which is a good thing, since most of these people are actually my friends in real life, and I would not want them to be betrothed to/knocked up by crazy gay Scientologists.
First there was Jessica, who is actually not my friend in real life, but rather a friend of Chase's. But you know, any friend of Chase's is a friend of mine. (This particularly applies to Spider-Man hottie James Franco, whose movie Chase apparently has a part in, a fact that he somehow forgot to mention to me. Tsk, tsk.) Anyway. I began reading Jessica's blog this summer, when she had just broken up with her long-term boyfriend. A week later, she went on a date. Another week after that, she and that date had decided they wanted to get married. Her most recent entry finds her trying on wedding dresses with someone I can only assume is actually MY mother, because she's the only person I know who behaves in such a manner while shopping with her daughters.
Next up was Lisa, who moved to South Carolina and within weeks had a super-fabulous boyfriend. (I've been living in the South for three years, mind you, and have been on, like, three dates. One of which may not have even been a date.) After about a month, he dropped the L-word, and Lisa scattered words like "bliss" and "cloud nine" liberally about her blog.
Then there's Danielle, who, after a somewhat checkered dating history in Birmingham (this girl knows what I'm dealing with here), moved to New York, decided to give online dating a whirl, and within, like, a week had met her friggin' soul mate.
Finally, KT joins the fray, with a new blog post so sweet that if it doesn't make your heart pound, too...well, you might want to get that checked out, because there's a large possibility your heart might be made of stone.
I probably wouldn't have ever pegged this as a trend if all four of these ladies' blogs didn't happen to be located right next to each other in the bookmarks folder that I click through when I'm reading blogs at work. Some days, perusing one gushing blog post after another can start to get tiring, but most of the time, I just find it an odd coincidence. It's also worth noting that several of the girls toward the middle of my bookmarks folder (Kristin, Rachel, Kella) are also very much in love, but have been so for a bit longer. So it seems that my bookmarks folder not only controls which of my blogging friends fall in love, but also at what speed they do so.
Given this inexplicable power I now seem to possess, I'm willing to use it to help you, my blogging friends, in your romantic endeavors. Been looking for love in all the wrong places? Put in for a transfer to the bottom of the list. Is your torrid love affair moving a little too fast for your liking? Let me know, and I'll move you up a few places. Now that I've discovered a new magical blog power, I fully intend to use it for good instead of evil. (Not that getting Julia DeMato kicked off American Idol wasn't good. Because it was. But this will be much better. Unless one of you falls in love with Julia DeMato, in which case, watch out.)
Among the blogs I read on a daily basis, I've started to notice a trend, which is that their authors seem to be falling in love, left and right, like there's no tomorrow. It's almost Tom Cruise/Katie Holmes-esque, only without the creepy Scientology brainwashing/publicity-stunt PDAs/mysterious pregnancy that you know had to be created artificially because everyone knows Tom Cruise is as gay as a box of birds, not to mention a stark-raving lunatic factor. All right, so other than the super-speed at which these courtships seem to be occuring, I guess they're nothing like Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes at all, which is a good thing, since most of these people are actually my friends in real life, and I would not want them to be betrothed to/knocked up by crazy gay Scientologists.
First there was Jessica, who is actually not my friend in real life, but rather a friend of Chase's. But you know, any friend of Chase's is a friend of mine. (This particularly applies to Spider-Man hottie James Franco, whose movie Chase apparently has a part in, a fact that he somehow forgot to mention to me. Tsk, tsk.) Anyway. I began reading Jessica's blog this summer, when she had just broken up with her long-term boyfriend. A week later, she went on a date. Another week after that, she and that date had decided they wanted to get married. Her most recent entry finds her trying on wedding dresses with someone I can only assume is actually MY mother, because she's the only person I know who behaves in such a manner while shopping with her daughters.
Next up was Lisa, who moved to South Carolina and within weeks had a super-fabulous boyfriend. (I've been living in the South for three years, mind you, and have been on, like, three dates. One of which may not have even been a date.) After about a month, he dropped the L-word, and Lisa scattered words like "bliss" and "cloud nine" liberally about her blog.
Then there's Danielle, who, after a somewhat checkered dating history in Birmingham (this girl knows what I'm dealing with here), moved to New York, decided to give online dating a whirl, and within, like, a week had met her friggin' soul mate.
Finally, KT joins the fray, with a new blog post so sweet that if it doesn't make your heart pound, too...well, you might want to get that checked out, because there's a large possibility your heart might be made of stone.
I probably wouldn't have ever pegged this as a trend if all four of these ladies' blogs didn't happen to be located right next to each other in the bookmarks folder that I click through when I'm reading blogs at work. Some days, perusing one gushing blog post after another can start to get tiring, but most of the time, I just find it an odd coincidence. It's also worth noting that several of the girls toward the middle of my bookmarks folder (Kristin, Rachel, Kella) are also very much in love, but have been so for a bit longer. So it seems that my bookmarks folder not only controls which of my blogging friends fall in love, but also at what speed they do so.
Given this inexplicable power I now seem to possess, I'm willing to use it to help you, my blogging friends, in your romantic endeavors. Been looking for love in all the wrong places? Put in for a transfer to the bottom of the list. Is your torrid love affair moving a little too fast for your liking? Let me know, and I'll move you up a few places. Now that I've discovered a new magical blog power, I fully intend to use it for good instead of evil. (Not that getting Julia DeMato kicked off American Idol wasn't good. Because it was. But this will be much better. Unless one of you falls in love with Julia DeMato, in which case, watch out.)
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