Wednesday, June 22, 2005
I came. I saw. I kind of conquered.
Apparently there is another secret to the Semi-Annual Sale. (That Victoria! So many secrets!) This is: If you’re going to go to the sale on the first day, you should have a lot of money to spend on undergarments. Which I don’t. Therefore, I could only by a fraction of what I wanted to buy, which was somewhat disappointing. Still, I was proud of myself for only exceeding by about $4 my self-imposed budget of 20 bucks.
The selection was dizzying. Dizzying, I tell you! In addition to the traditional plastic bins, they also had drawers underneath them filled with even more sale merchandise, a phenomenon I had never witnessed before. Not only that, but the drawers were even semi-organized by color and style. It was almost overwhelming. At one point, I think I had seven pairs of panties strung onto my forearm before one of the salesgirls took pity on me and offered me a bag.
In addition to the lack of funds dilemma, the broad selection presented another conundrum, in that I was tempted to buy items I knew I shouldn’t. For example:
-Boy shorts. These do not look good on me. I learned that the hard way when I bought some at the last Semi-Annual Sale. Also, they give really bad wedgies. You’d think this wouldn’t happen, given the extra amount of coverage they provide, but somehow it does. Plus, I always feel strange wearing them under clothes, like I’m wearing two sets of pants or something. But when I see them in the bin, they’re almost too cute to resist. Especially if they’re pink with red script and little red bows on them. It was hard to put those back.
-Horizontal stripes. If you happen to think your bum is too big, the general wisdom is that it’s not good to cover it in horizontal stripes. And yet I love horizontal stripes, especially in the bright, fun colors that were at the sale yesterday. I finally allowed myself one horizontal-striped item, but only because the stripes were widely spaced and probably won’t do much damage. (And also because they reminded me, as rainbow stripes always do, of my childhood.) However, I did have to give myself a stern talking-to for seriously considering a pair of horizontal-striped boy shorts.
-Sexy lingerie. There are those women who will tell you that wearing sexy undergarments even when you know they won’t be seen is its own personal thrill, but sometimes, I think these women are lying. Because a black mesh bra with hot-pink tulle ruffles? Was clearly made to be seen. And considering that the only people currently seeing my underwear are me, the other women in the locker room at my gym, and anyone who might happen to walk by my apartment and catch a glimpse of me walking around in my underwear before bed (none of whom merit hot-pink tulle ruffles), I really have no need for this kind of stuff, particularly when I’m on a budget.
Now if I can only keep myself from going back to the sale to buy all those items I desperately wanted but wouldn’t let myself have. This could be a challenge.
Apparently there is another secret to the Semi-Annual Sale. (That Victoria! So many secrets!) This is: If you’re going to go to the sale on the first day, you should have a lot of money to spend on undergarments. Which I don’t. Therefore, I could only by a fraction of what I wanted to buy, which was somewhat disappointing. Still, I was proud of myself for only exceeding by about $4 my self-imposed budget of 20 bucks.
The selection was dizzying. Dizzying, I tell you! In addition to the traditional plastic bins, they also had drawers underneath them filled with even more sale merchandise, a phenomenon I had never witnessed before. Not only that, but the drawers were even semi-organized by color and style. It was almost overwhelming. At one point, I think I had seven pairs of panties strung onto my forearm before one of the salesgirls took pity on me and offered me a bag.
In addition to the lack of funds dilemma, the broad selection presented another conundrum, in that I was tempted to buy items I knew I shouldn’t. For example:
-Boy shorts. These do not look good on me. I learned that the hard way when I bought some at the last Semi-Annual Sale. Also, they give really bad wedgies. You’d think this wouldn’t happen, given the extra amount of coverage they provide, but somehow it does. Plus, I always feel strange wearing them under clothes, like I’m wearing two sets of pants or something. But when I see them in the bin, they’re almost too cute to resist. Especially if they’re pink with red script and little red bows on them. It was hard to put those back.
-Horizontal stripes. If you happen to think your bum is too big, the general wisdom is that it’s not good to cover it in horizontal stripes. And yet I love horizontal stripes, especially in the bright, fun colors that were at the sale yesterday. I finally allowed myself one horizontal-striped item, but only because the stripes were widely spaced and probably won’t do much damage. (And also because they reminded me, as rainbow stripes always do, of my childhood.) However, I did have to give myself a stern talking-to for seriously considering a pair of horizontal-striped boy shorts.
-Sexy lingerie. There are those women who will tell you that wearing sexy undergarments even when you know they won’t be seen is its own personal thrill, but sometimes, I think these women are lying. Because a black mesh bra with hot-pink tulle ruffles? Was clearly made to be seen. And considering that the only people currently seeing my underwear are me, the other women in the locker room at my gym, and anyone who might happen to walk by my apartment and catch a glimpse of me walking around in my underwear before bed (none of whom merit hot-pink tulle ruffles), I really have no need for this kind of stuff, particularly when I’m on a budget.
Now if I can only keep myself from going back to the sale to buy all those items I desperately wanted but wouldn’t let myself have. This could be a challenge.
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