Monday, October 06, 2003
"Take this child, Lord, from Tucson, Arizona"
Things I learned on last week's business trip to Arizona (which is, by the way, where the heck I've been, for those of you who were wondering):
-Airports need copy-editors. In the parking ramp at the Birmingham airport, I saw a sign that said "Yeild." Then when I got to Tucson, I saw bathrooms in the airport labeled as "Womens" and "Mens." Sheesh. Where's the Rogue Copy Editor when you need her?
-There are bugs in Arizona. In fact, there are more bugs in Arizona than there are in Alabama. And generally, they are bigger. However, they are also, on the whole, much prettier. I don't know if that makes them better or worse.
-I didn't really realize how much I took grass for granted until it wasn't there anymore.
-Food always tastes better when a) you're really hungry and b) it's free. So eating free food when you're really hungry might possibly be the best meal ever.
-Actually, eating free Mexican food when you're really hungry at a restaurant with a live mariachi band is unequivocally the best meal ever.
-Front shovels are really fun to operate. I want one to play with in my backyard. OK, so I don't technically have a backyard, so I would need to get one of those first. And I'd probably need a quarry or a mine or something, because that's what the front shovels are really made for. But once I get my own backyard quarry, I am totally getting a front shovel!
-Being at a mining event only served to reinforce my residual anger over being duped at that fake coal mine in Wales. Yes, three and a half years later, I am still mad about that! Why couldn't they just tell us it was a model of a mine? Why did they have to make us think we were actually going 40 feet underground into a real mine? Damn you, fake coal mine!
-I am not used to staying at nice hotels. On Friday while I was waiting for my ride to the airport, I went into the hotel's restaurant and asked if they had a continental breakfast. They pointed me to a table with some pastries and fruit and gave me a take-out box to put some stuff in. So I took a couple of croissants and some strawberries and raspberries, and went out into the lobby to eat while waiting for my ride. A few minutes later, a waitress came running out of the restaurant with a bill. Apparently "continental" does not mean "free." Who knew? Anyway, they proceded to charge me $10 for my two croissants and paltry helping of fruit. Ten dollars! You can bet I'm putting that on my expense report.
I returned from Arizona on Friday afternoon, only to find that a) the check engine light was on in my car (again), b) there was a letter in my mailbox from the bank stating that my account had been overdrawn (due to the hotel putting a $225 deposit on my card despite the fact that I was not paying for the room and despite the fact that, when I asked the girl at the desk if she was charging my card when she swiped it, she said no), and c) my free cable had been disconnected (for real this time), along with a stern note from the cable company, saying that I might be considered an unauthorized recipient of cable television, subject to fines and imprisonment. Gaaah! I want to go back to Arizona.
Things I learned on last week's business trip to Arizona (which is, by the way, where the heck I've been, for those of you who were wondering):
-Airports need copy-editors. In the parking ramp at the Birmingham airport, I saw a sign that said "Yeild." Then when I got to Tucson, I saw bathrooms in the airport labeled as "Womens" and "Mens." Sheesh. Where's the Rogue Copy Editor when you need her?
-There are bugs in Arizona. In fact, there are more bugs in Arizona than there are in Alabama. And generally, they are bigger. However, they are also, on the whole, much prettier. I don't know if that makes them better or worse.
-I didn't really realize how much I took grass for granted until it wasn't there anymore.
-Food always tastes better when a) you're really hungry and b) it's free. So eating free food when you're really hungry might possibly be the best meal ever.
-Actually, eating free Mexican food when you're really hungry at a restaurant with a live mariachi band is unequivocally the best meal ever.
-Front shovels are really fun to operate. I want one to play with in my backyard. OK, so I don't technically have a backyard, so I would need to get one of those first. And I'd probably need a quarry or a mine or something, because that's what the front shovels are really made for. But once I get my own backyard quarry, I am totally getting a front shovel!
-Being at a mining event only served to reinforce my residual anger over being duped at that fake coal mine in Wales. Yes, three and a half years later, I am still mad about that! Why couldn't they just tell us it was a model of a mine? Why did they have to make us think we were actually going 40 feet underground into a real mine? Damn you, fake coal mine!
-I am not used to staying at nice hotels. On Friday while I was waiting for my ride to the airport, I went into the hotel's restaurant and asked if they had a continental breakfast. They pointed me to a table with some pastries and fruit and gave me a take-out box to put some stuff in. So I took a couple of croissants and some strawberries and raspberries, and went out into the lobby to eat while waiting for my ride. A few minutes later, a waitress came running out of the restaurant with a bill. Apparently "continental" does not mean "free." Who knew? Anyway, they proceded to charge me $10 for my two croissants and paltry helping of fruit. Ten dollars! You can bet I'm putting that on my expense report.
I returned from Arizona on Friday afternoon, only to find that a) the check engine light was on in my car (again), b) there was a letter in my mailbox from the bank stating that my account had been overdrawn (due to the hotel putting a $225 deposit on my card despite the fact that I was not paying for the room and despite the fact that, when I asked the girl at the desk if she was charging my card when she swiped it, she said no), and c) my free cable had been disconnected (for real this time), along with a stern note from the cable company, saying that I might be considered an unauthorized recipient of cable television, subject to fines and imprisonment. Gaaah! I want to go back to Arizona.
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